if you know something bad is about to happen

I read a most frightening horoscope for 2017. I translated it to something like this (fellow Capricorns please proceed with caution):

This is the year of uncovering hidden truths. Whether the truth be good or bad, the most you can do is to accept it. Capricorns prefer to end or phase out relationships on good terms, even though this can be pernicious for the soul. However, this may not be possible this year if the uncovered truth is going to be bad. Try to see it in a positive way, you’ll finally understand what’s been going on. Don’t rush yourself to feel okay again. Give yourself time and space, and learn to confide in friends and people you trust. Try to be grateful for what happened anyway, for the experience and the lessons it brings. The world is a big and wonderful place with plenty of things and people for you to enjoy and appreciate.

Then it tags on a note at the end as if to say, on the off chance that “if the uncovered truth is good, congratulations. You may get married, a promotion or a baby.”

Is this frightening or is it just me? Uncovering truths – like being found out for something you did wrong and you don’t know what it is yet? Or finding out something terrible. And not being able to stay on good terms with people, which means to me a bad break up, which is a dungeon of dark emotions.

I need help. Who has been through this?

The Little Mermaid, I just met her at the 5th Avenue Theatre last week. How would she feel when the Prince find out she’s not human? Mulan, when they find out she’s tricked everyone to believe she was a man. That’s a big lie too.

How about wives who find out her husband has been unfaithful? And husbands who confess or get found out they’ve been cheating?

These are some life-shattering excruciating truths to be uncovered.

Some of them knew that one day they might be found out.
Some never saw it coming.
None of them are bad people, probably not even the cheating husbands.
None of them, at the beginning of that year, had any idea that this uncovering was going to happen.
Nobody at the beginning of the year have any idea that there would be painful things ahead.

It felt better to know that I’m not alone and people deal with this all the time. When that ominous prediction comes true, I’ll let it hurt and not hustle. 

 


This is the horoscope by a mystic called Monita in Hong Kong.

Day 14: Boundaries 103

pexels-photo-87836
(my caption for this: not graceful but I did it)

Life doesn’t stay still. For the past few days in 14 Days of Love, only good things have been happening. Haircut, taking time off work, going on a trip with my husband, G. And the day after I come back, BAM! The phone rings and with it brings a Boundary Violation Alert!

I’m still not in a place where I can be wholeheartedly grateful for family members doing things for me that I have asked them not to do. Does such a place exists? In fact, I’m in a place where I’m starting to get angry about it, and where I no longer want to persuade myself that it’s no big deal, and then twist myself into smiling and sounding like I’m glad they did it.

There was time for me to think about how to handle this one, and I tried to come up with what to say using “I” sentences instead of “You” sentences.

It went about 80% according to plan, which would have made this a success. But it turned out that I did not like the script I wrote. I seemed a bit disingenuous and passive-aggressive. I sort of went over the top. So, I remind myself that this is like learning hip hop dance. You do get better at it by trying and practicing, but better can sometimes look like a new kind of bad. It’s okay. Doing it badly or imperfectly is not a reason to stop doing it at all. It’s all progress.

four big truths…

 

Four big truths (among many) from this conversation between Emma Watson and Gloria Steinum:

  1. Women can have a disturbing long conversation about how unhappy they are with their bodies and the way they look.
  2. Companies make a lot of money when women feel really bad about themselves.
  3. “Each body on its own make total sense without their ridiculous little bra” and other things that “referred to some other ideal”.
  4. “Body decoration is a human impulse”.

Discussion on body image starts about 50:00 but the whole conversation is worth listening to! I’m sure you’ll find others that resonate with you!